The lessons of life (My take on the Physicswallah incident)

 

Dear Mate

The recent incident of a teacher hurling abuses at a student and threatening her of physical violence for showing some ahem purple love is doing the rounds these days. So is the half-hearted, not so well-meant apology he attempted. Now to those who are saying BTS is way above these petty attacks and ARMYs should just full on ignore this, the homophobic comments he passed at BTS are not the problem here.

The much bigger problem is the threats he tries to pass off as a mere scolding… Now a scolding would be along the lines of:

Do this and I will throw you out of the class or something like that which is perfectly acceptable since you are supposedly a teacher(!).

But we were shocked to hear words like:

Quote:

If you weren’t a girl, I would’ve grabbed your collar and slapped you. Your cheeks would’ve been swollen so much that you wouldn’t be able to say ‘BTS’…I would’ve punched you so hard your nose would start bleeding.

The video is so problematic that anyone with a sane mind would be uncomfortable and alarmed at the mental state of this person.

It just gives a message that it is wrong to have a successful, positive role model in your life if they do not conform to the society norms about masculinity. Moreover, it emphasizes that anything significant can only be achieved by doggedly pursuing academics and ignoring all other active interests in your life.

It is the same as classifying students who are passionate about their studies as nerds.

Speaking about the apology…,

It basically went like

I am stressed

Engaged all day in teaching and when I am not teaching I am making PPTs

Could not see the doubts other students were posting in the comment threads.

But my parents and wife pointed out that I was wrong.

Ok so you did not arrive on this conclusion on your own. You are saying sorry only because your family members think you are wrong. That too only after the incident went viral and even the Korean media took cognizance.

Some major a** saving there.

As a teacher, your job does not end at teaching the subjects. You are equally responsible for teaching the children the importance of having a well-balanced life. It is never wrong to have and discuss active interests. I leave you with the question:

If it was a couple of students discussing yesterday’s cricket match or world cup football for that matter, would your reaction be the same?

I don't think so!

Walk Alone VI

Dear God

What goes wrong every time I try to find love? I am not unlovable God, I have people in my life who are always there for me and who lift my spirits when I feel low. People who cherish and admire my strength and look forward to my advice all the time. People I wish I can be a good example to. I am a good person and You have time and again given me chances to prove that all through my life. Yet when it comes to lifelong commitment, I have no end in sight anytime soon, why?

At this point in my life, I have given up looking for love or companionship on the outside. Yet my life is graced with people who love and respect me unconditionally. Inside I still long for the special one and I know it is not going to happen.

So slowly I pick up the pieces every time and just try to move on with my life.

Yet it is never easy. The closures have so many lose ends and there are words which I still need to say or hear. Sometimes, actually all the times there are some things which are left midway and the ties are never cut completely.

Then they try to come back to the comforting cocoon that I am and I can no longer have them. For when I wanted to curl up into a ball in my life, I only had my fur babies for comfort. Its been ages since I slept in a house bustling with people.

People come and go in my home and it is a blessing that they do. For I love me time and the quietness it brings. Yet sometimes I long to share my life and day with someone…

Sometimes it feels like a mistake that I never actively tried the conventional matchmaking for getting me a companion. Yet whenever I think of carrying the chai ki tray and answering questions like ‘Khana bana leti ho?’ my mind just revolts.

Not to mention I am so scared of a person/family who will use me and my resources without due regard to my wishes for a true companion. The worst would be a long-distance relationship at this point of time.

I don’t want to be the man in the relationship and I want to be taken care of. Despite being strong I wish someone would treat me with gentleness and care. I would love that!! Yet whenever someone is in my life, they end up being pampered. While I be the provider and protector for them…

Now, I refuse to be that and so I deliberately choose this isolation and finally bid adieu to the hope of finding love. Let love find me if it is destined to be.

A Jumbled mind

 

Dear God

Am I bipolar? Manic depressive or eternal optimist? Someone to idolize or someone who has lots to improve? Someone sweet and gentle in her ways or a maniac? Someone who always looks at the bright side of things or someone whose glass is always on the empty side?

Here is a look into my troubled mind and the havoc it has been since yesterday:

Am I losing my mind sometimes I feel I am this positive happy person with a great self-image and then I wear myself out with self-deprecation. Struggling with both kind soothing words I say to myself and the filthiest possible insults I hurl I don’t know what I should think of me anymore!

Sometimes feel like manic depressive other times shining beacon of light

Sometimes shaking with rage other times calm in the face of all adversity

Is it just me or everyone feels like this once or many times in life

Who is the real me?

The obsessive maniacally suspicious girlfriend or the caring charming girl you guys look up to!

What triggers that and what motivates this... How do I get out of this rut and feel better?

How do I show you my best face when I am broken from inside and tough to stay whole outside?

With everything falling apart cant place finger on what’s wrong

Sometimes all wrong it seems sometimes everything seems right

Becoming a slave to my jumbled emotions; creating masterpieces of my misery

Confused as hell with no way out in sight

I fight everyday with all my might

Feeling this urgent need to save myself yet feel like the savior

Sometimes feel the world will keel if I so desire…

At times feeling helpless to change my own fate

At other times feeling like the masters of the universe.

I am a person of many faults and sins yet feel flawlessly innocent at times.

All this conflict behind closed doors, in public always smiling.

No one has any idea of the sleepless nights when I meet them like sunshine…

Am I happy and pretending sad or is it the other way round? Is my smile fake or my tears are shallow, no way to know? Am I really being unfair to someone and quick to judge? Or there is merit in my fears?

Am I intensely negative as people claim or I am all sunshine and daisies? Am I ever going to get out of this rut and feel light or will I be forever burdened with this isolation and the feeling of being alone forever?

Am I enough for myself or do I need this other person in my life? Do I help or harm?

Oh! the struggles of a mind which is slipping so fast into the deep dungeons of depression. Yet holds on tenaciously to the one little dangling root with all its might. Will it be saved from its horrors or will it sink; only time will tell.

Corporate Blues: Uncomfortable truths

 

Dear God

Sample this:

Wearing a new dress, you approach your office. Everyone who is standing there turns their head in your direction. Suddenly one of them says:

Waah madam aaj to kya lag rhi ho aap

All this while scanning you from head to toe.

Then this:

You are unmarried and this fact is well known in your office. Yet you get invites official or otherwise where there is a clear mention of a certain Mrs. ‘Yours truly’. Hash!! Man give me a break.

And then this:

You get random messages from people in your office citing invitations for dinner, coffee, outings etc. All this when you have not shown any interest in the person concerned all this while. Time and again you clarify that you are least interested in talking or even getting to know this person.

And the one which takes the cake is:

Bacche krne ki umr nikli ja rhi hai tumhari. Jaldi karo warna budha jaogi to koi fayda nahin hoga.

You put up a fight on so many fronts in life and one of them is work. When you step out of your home, sweet home you fight not one but many battles in the giant war against the world. One of the battles is proving you alone are enough to face the world and represent you. Being unmarried is a personal choice and yet in your professional life it becomes a war of two worlds: one prim proper, husband, children wala and the other visits to vets, hometown, trips and living alone wala.

Please admit that you envy my life and you want to be free too. Not this sly undermining of my situation, backhanded compliments and tirchchi nazariya on my car, my driving, my new clothes, accessories and so on….

My Crackheads family: Home away from home

Dear God

Sample this:

हम टुटेसिरों की राम राम। क्या है कि रोज़ सुबह हमको जो Gud Morning प्राप्त होते हैं.. बड़े boring हैं इसलिए अब हमारा वाला Gud Morning देख लीजिए। Style पिंकी aka गुलबिया का है हम पूरी बेशर्मी के साथ कॉपी किए हैं

Gud Morning message:

शुभ सुबह💜😘👻🤪🙈🤩😘🤔🙄🤨😛🤓🤨😚🤨🙂😗😏🥳😗😜🤩🥳😏😒😠😶‍🌫😤😡😶‍🌫😖😥🤥🤭🤬😱🤭😧😐😦😓😐


इसका जवाब:

एक purple दिल था जिसको चुम्मी मिली फिर वो भूत और पागल बन गया और शर्मा भी गया। उसकी आँखों मे तारे चमकने लगे फिर चुम्मी मिली। वो सोचने लगा और फिर irritate हुआ फिर भूत की ओर प्रश्नवाचक निगाह से देखा। भूत ने इंसानी रूप लेकर जीभ चिढ़ा दिया। फिर उसको चस्मा लग गया फिर प्रश्नवाचक निगाह फिर सीटी फिर प्रश्नवाचक। भूत सीधा ही स्माइल किया फिर smirk, सीटी फिर party फिर सीटी फिर आंख मारा ( छिछोरे!) फिर आंखों में तारे फिर party फिर smirk फिर राशि वाला expression फिर गुस्सा। अब चांद छुपा बादल में। बैल वाला गुस्सा, लाल मुंह वाला तेज़ गुस्सा, फिर छुपा nervous हुआ झूठा फिर हंसा गाली दिया ( गन्दा लड़का हुंह) haai raam फिर हंसा बेशरम फिर डर गया फिर शिवि का प्रेम फिर डरा, nervous हुआ फिर शिवि वाला फिर उसका दिमाग उड़ गया फिर nervous हुआ और किसी से न कहना

And this:

Who is Vimla? Mystery resolved:

 

Now you are going to think, what madness is this? This is The Crackheads for you… one most random mix of people who came together and became friends for life 😊.

One unbreakable bond of selfless love and care…and communication. The most random words which mean gibberish to you but to us they matter the most. Okay let’s begin from the beginning:

We started with fanmily: Ankiyans* and Animaz* and then became friends forever to each other. We have all been through difficult times and yet here we are. Sometimes I think of the journey we have all covered throughout our lives and now with each other. The incredible stories we have shared with each other are all tales of love, loss, suffering and then learning to love yourself all over again. When I think of how far we have come, I can only wonder at the progress, their growth and the way they now handle life. 

We are all so damaged and this friendship is like a gentle breeze in the face of our open wounds. There have been so many days when we have laughed, cried, shared, cared and then compared battle wounds too.

Life albeit difficult has become a joyride and a promise of endless love. I wish we all are there with each other throughout this journey called life.

The most interesting thing about Crackheads is Now we have two very special members in it. In my wildest dreams I had never imagined that one day Anku and Garima would be a part of Crackheads - that was the day I literally cried tears of joy. 

With you Crackiz, every day is a blessing.

Saranghae, Borahae, Always

*Ankiyans : Fans of Anku Thakur - Writer on Pratilipi App and now with two books Who Are You and You and Me - A beautiful Journey available on Amazon. 

Also available audio books on Kuku FM 

* Animaz : Fans of Anku and Garima Singh Both writers on Pratilipi App. Garima's stories are currently available on Pratilipi. 

 

Corporate Blues: Appreciations Galore

 

Dear God

Sample this:

One sweet voice, beautiful appearance and carefully chosen outfit. People in awe of the way you are, praising, admiring, clearing your way, handling your obstacles and loving you with all their hearts, sharing and caring and endless conversations. Suddenly being appreciated for all that you are and all that you do.

At times, I wonder am I the same person or is this some alternate universe where I stepped in? How could I be so good when I have been considered so bad… worse even. I can’t forget that last year I experienced the biggest setback in my career and personal life. And yet here I am!!!

Where the hell was this fighting spirit all this while? I could have had this positivity earlier also na, God? Why now, and how? If I get to know, I would be able to help people who are feeling not so positive in their life. Is it really all there in the mind only? Or is there something the world has to do? What was it that made it difficult for me to even get out of bed? What is it that now helps me wake up with a smile on my face and twinkle in my eyes.

Its not like my difficult days have disappeared altogether. I still go through tough times. Yet somehow in my heart I know this is not going to last forever. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

When I think of that time now, it seems so far away …. All that has been wiped from my mind as if it never existed. Yet in the back of my mind I know, that phase was there… It was a time when nothing worked. Today it seems as if everything is just working for me.

One thing which held me through all this is a bunch of friends – The Crackheads. Crackheads deserve an article of their own. The way they took me through these difficult times, constantly appreciating, helping, making jokes, holding hands, going through difficult times together. We have a long way to go and:

I am no longer alone.

Auf Weidersehen my furry friend

Dear Fruity

Meri fruita my baby, my jaan – whoever owns a furry friend would probably understand what I am going through. Those who don’t – just think of someone dear to you, aged around 3 years old and with all the innocence in the world. Someone whose loyalty is absolute and intention so pure.

Think of someone who will act like the universe revolves around you and that you are the Sun and they the earth. Think of love so pure, it will melt the hardest of hearts. Think of companionship, think of acceptance and absolute honesty. Think of childish questions and being happy in the smallest little things. Think if the words ‘Always there for you’ had a face and name it would be your furball, your dog, your adorable goofy kid. Yes kid! Being a dog parent is nothing short of being parent.

What happened yesterday is every pet owner’s horrible nightmare yet when it comes true…. I would not wish this upon anyone at all.  I am going back in time when I used to have Duffy my mix bred…. First dog in the family.

And now we lost you to reasons unknown. Fruity my lovely child please come back in the form of another furball I can love and cherish. Thank you for the time, love and attention you gave me. Thankyou for the love, care and happiness I experienced with you my baby. Moreover, thanks for all the small goofy silly puppies you gave birth to one of whom is Chiku.

Now I miss him more than ever, wish I was with him now. Will get him here soon in front of my eyes and I promise one thing to you –

In future I will try to spend as much time as possible with both Winky and Chiku. I know their time on earth is so... so… brief but it is up to me to make the most of it. To fill these days with beautiful memories and absolute love. The same love that they offer I can return in teeny tiny proportions.

And when the time comes for the rainbow bridge – I will wait till we meet again.

Love you

*Auf Weidersehen - See you again (In German)