Intolerant Me

THE PAST:

अच्छे ने अच्छा और बुरे ने बुरा जाना मुझे

जिसकी जैसी फितरत थी उसने वैसा पहचाना मुझे

Dear God

A lot of words have been said about the importance of honesty in relationships and everywhere else. Everyone wants everyone to speak their hearts out, share their concerns and tell no lies. Everyone wants everyone to have open conversations, set realistic limits and have a balanced life. Or so I believed.

The truth is so far from this. I am still reeling with the shock of the backbiting spree. But thanks to You, I can cope. I can cope. I can cope or else I can fool the world into believing that I can cope.

God, my words are jumbled, confused and swinging both ways. One me says let it all out and the other is a diplomat. God, in situations like this, people use this little thing called tact. Not my middle word exactly!

Odd – one word which comes to my mind when I want to describe myself. For isn’t it odd that I have been open about myself even when I could sugar coat everything and just glaze over the important parts.

It is like an agreement with the Japanese where they argue each and every point until a mutual agreement is reached. Then they honour every word written there. The kind of self-policing I subject myself to is the same. No one does that.

Well! Tactless me ….

THE PRESENT:

यूँ बेवजह तो खामोश नहीं हूँ मैं

कुछ तो बर्दाश्त किया होगा

Silence is Gold. In the face of everything, here is my answer. Zilch, nada, nothing, sifer. I choose to go my way and silently so. Hard work pays, so does persistence. Therefore God, I surrender the facts to You now.

The best rebuttal so far is the smile I have on my lips even though my eyes are filled with tears of betrayal. Let my work speak. I have been following this since time immemorial.

For I know that it is darkest before dawn and no mountain is unsurmountable. This mountain of accusations will soon become molehill with Your blessings. I love You God and I love the life You bestowed upon me. Your Blessings are with me as I leave all this behind.

I found my purpose in life and it is nothing more than to live each day as if it is my last. Thank You for letting me live to the fullest.

Love You.

Disclaimer: The story I share with you all today; may or may not be true. For as a writer I am certainly influenced by what I see around me. At the same time, I retain what I call and known as artistic liberty. 

 Credits: All shayaris used in this article are couplets by Mirza Ghalib.