Dear Love,
So it’s time for you to turn a page! Turn the page but you have to be the
first one to do so. You will have to be the first one to walk away in this
relationship. That’s because my love for you is not allowing me to. I want to
keep my hope alive, I want to try till the last breath I have in me. And yet I
stay away from you – for your peace of mind. Still can’t resist trying to know
how you are, how you have been. If my love, my care, my affection and the
things I told you…nothing can touch your heart then maybe It’s time for me to
move on. It’s time for me to clear your way. It’s the least I can do. I am in a
lot of pain and I am missing you like hell. This reminds me of the immortal
words of Geetanjali which I read some time back:
“From now on I leave off all petty decorations. Lord of my heart, no more
shall there be for me waiting and weeping in corners, no more coyness and
sweetness of demeanor. Thou hast given me thy sword for adornment. No more
doll’s decorations for me!”
How many more nights to go before I can sleep without crying my eyes out?
How many more days before I can feel myself again, how much more time to resist
the urge to pick up the phone and talk to you? Where to find the courage to
delete your messages, trash your photographs, burn the diary entries, clear my
table of all the sweet nothings I used to make our memories? How much more time
before I can think of picking up painting again? What would it take for me to
dance again, laugh again, and feel alive again? What do I do….?
I lost myself when I lost you. I lost the person I am when I am with you. I
wish you come back in my life. I wish you were with me right now. I wish and I
keep on wishing!!
THE PRESENT:
Date Night:
Today he came to pick me and took me for a drive again. The way he takes
care of the small, little things makes me feel so special. He makes me feel so
safe, so secure, cherished and protected. Today something shifted, the way he
treated me today…everything felt different. I used to think us being together
was a far-fetched dream. Well! That far-fetched dream came true. As we embark
on this journey together, we know that we have a promising future and so many
sweet memories in our wake. The best part was when he started singing so many
songs for me. I love the way he is opening up and being comfortable. Thank you
so much God, it is one of the best evenings of my life. Absolutely something to
be cherished forever.
Disclaimer: The story I share with you all today; may or may not be true. For as a writer I am certainly influenced by what I see around me. At the same time, I retain what I call and known as artistic liberty.
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