Rear Them Right!

Dear God

Picture this:

Beta flying kiss do aunty ko.

In a birthday party of about 50 people, the proud mother was asking her child to demonstrate the ‘flying kiss’ which she found cute! Let me be frank with You, there was nothing cute about it. It is intrusive to say the best. Not to mention it puts unnecessary pressure on the child. Your child is not a toy guys. Occasionally showcasing their talent in appropriate platforms is OK but forcing them to express affection to people they hardly know is downright improper. With so many child molesters lurking around, the least we can do is not encourage behavior the child fails to understand.

Having said this, I was reminded of the various talent shows and the children gyrating to songs like Jalebi Bai or Chikni Chameli. These ‘mini adults’ and their patrons fail to realize they are just children. Even after the age of 18, we were forbidden to behave in a certain way. These children are doing so much at such tender age. Not to mention the long rehearsals and the kind of hard work they have to do. Studies and a sense of normalcy have taken a back seat. Having achieved a celebrity status, it will be really hard for these children to go back to their normal lives.

We cannot deny that giving a platform to under-privileged or differently-abled children is a good way to uplift their moral as well as upgrade their socio-economic status. But for the sake of a few talented children, we are forcing those with normal abilities to push themselves.  If we are subjecting our children to this public eye, we should also back them up with the notion that ‘They don’t have to be super children for us to appreciate them. A normal, healthy, well mannered kid is equally important for us as a talented one.’ A whole life lies ahead of them to join the rat race. Why the rush? Why the urgency? Why the pressure? Let us just let them be. For me as a mother, I would be happy for my child playing with his/her friends in the park. Rather than see them pushing their limits in the spotlight.

Go, went, gone...

Dear God

He is still in the clutches of that woman and unlikely to be free of it anytime soon. It’s up to me now to either chuck everything and move on with my life. Or be the Meena Kumari and say ‘Wo bhatak gaye hain par ek din zarur wapas aayenge. Mujhe vishwas hai.’ What kind of world have You created God? There is nothing here for honest and transparent people. Today he took away my responsibilities and said ‘You have done nothing so far. It is highly unlikely that you will be able to anytime soon.’ My brainchild is in the hands of someone else now. I tried convincing him not to but in vain. He wants results!

I tried to convince him that this is an automated system. You are not going to get results in here without constantly learning and improving it as we go along. But Mr. Clouded judgement of the year (!) renders me incapable of doing this. What to do God? I handed it over like it was nothing. But my heart is broken at the way he has expended me at the drop of a hat. I never asked anything of him.

Our relationship is at an all time low. I don’t know how, when and if we will be able to recover. I have always been the one to take the blame. But now I forgive myself for being the way I am. This is how I was always supposed to be – alone. I dared try different things and believed a different future. Sorry God. Just for some human interaction I have destroyed myself. All these years I believed the fault is all mine. But now I choose to love myself. I promise You God, from this moment onwards I will stop believing the shit your world pukes about me.

All my life I have tried to change for people who abandoned me anyways. So now, I will stop changing for my sake. I will remain what I am now – love me or leave me. You are going to leave anyways so there is no point. Screw positive thinking. Bring on the dreariness. I am willing to welcome my darkest side with open arms now. Trying my hands at the ‘Being positive’ Shit never works anyways.

Save the people who will confront me now.

Miles to go...

Dear God,

A chance meeting with a schoolmate and so many things came rushing back. My school…that one place, which carved my future, made me what I am now. I was such a shy kid and now look at me. Henceforth proven; People change, as I did. From not being able to speak two sentences straight, I have come to the point where I have started addressing crowds at random. I was the shy back bencher all through my school life and now here I am. Facing life head on has taught me one thing very clearly. It is a man’s world and women rule!!

I don’t actually remember the transition but I do remember my determination to face all my demons head on. I have this favourite saying of sorts “If you are afraid of the roller coaster, by all means ride it.” Now, when I look back at the roller coasters I rode, I feel dizzy and exhilarated. Wow!

All these big and small successes and failures are any person’s strongest assets. I remember reading in Laws of Love by Chris Prentiss  ‘Learnings never happened on regular days.  It happens only when you encounter challenging situations.’ My biggest challenge so far has been to love myself. I hate my guts! Inspite of everything, my smile never wavers. My spirit is crushed but with an unlimited ability to resurrect itself.

My sister used to call me ‘The Moral Science Book.’ Overrated, if I may say so myself. I am no such thing but my sense of right and wrong does keep working overtime! Ironically my list of ‘Do’s and Don’ts is for I, me, myself only. Being assertive is a trait I could never master. With my kind of intelligence and compassion, a certain level of detachment is also much needed God. Otherwise a person like me can get completely lost in others’ needs and wants. This distance from the world is a blessing in disguise. Thank You God! For this life and everything that came with it. I love You for bestowing me with such an enriched experience.

PS: Send me some love too! Please!

The Road Sense

Dear God

Indicator given, horn briefly honked and turning right....Dchhaakkk! Someone makes a sharp turn right at the point where I am turning my vehicle and I hit the brakes hard. Kya karu? All the Surdas’s of the world seem to reside here only. Am I right or am I right, God? There is no charm in following the rules here God. Everybody is just a manmauji interested in whirling their darling machines left, right and center. Accelerators are meant to be twisted hard. No one cares if you are on the right path following the traffic rules to the T. You will still get the dirty looks when you drive.

So much has been said and done for road safety. But someone literally should brainwash these kids in their teens. Over-speeding, rash driving and adrenaline pumped fools who think the roads are meant for playing Road Rash.

I don’t understand why every destination must be reached in record time. Kiska record? I don’t see any world record authorities taking notes here. This one is a small town and everything is in walking distance. Most of all, over-speeding can take you someplace in one minute instead of two. Still not worth risking your life, guys.  

The inherent desire to win the rat race in life is to be blamed for this. We never teach our children that being slow is ok. All we want is for them to come first and accept nothing less. So they just adapt this same ideology when they drive. Everything is a race and they have to win. Stop it, guys. Neither life now commute is a race. It is ok to savor the moments and let people get ahead of you. Take your own time with everything. Life is precious and so are the moments you have. Nothing is going to come back. So stay back, relax and enjoy the view too.

Been there, done that

Dear God

What do I want from a relationship? One word answer would be commitment. I wish for someone who would love me the way I am. Trust me and plan a future that includes me. Rest all I can take care of. It is hard though. I am a strong woman. No one believes me when I say I would love for someone to take care of me.  

He said you are to blame for that. Who would believe a self-made, self driven, ambitious person like you would have needs like this? That is the beauty of life guys. No matter how strong the person is, people always secretly love it when doors are opened for them and chairs pulled up. But when people see strong people, they get confused.

I am someone who has arranged her whole life in neat little piles. People expect me to be a little self sacrificing. Come on now, you have a career, money and now you want love too! Too much to ask.. Reading ‘The Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne, I tried my hand at positive thinking. At times, it seems far-fetched wearing the rose tinted glasses to see the world. But it does work guys and it is worth a try.

I mean if we can dwell on endless negativity for hours on end maybe we can spend a few minutes being positive and upbeat. It is a much better way to deal with things if you ask me.

So come what may, I am sticking to this premise from now on. Let the world call me a fool; at least I am happier than all the wise of the world. I am sure I will soon be rewarded infinitely for my tenacity. Love You God. Make it happen and dazzle the world.