In a man's world

Dear God

Gender discrimination is a slow poison and a silent killer too! These days when I am single-handedly conducting some programs and have been a part of so many new initiatives, the fingers which were raised in doubts about my ability now point towards my faults at the way I fulfill my official commitments. People who voiced their opinions about how I am just not good enough have now started saying I am ‘too good to be true.’ May be God!

I am enjoying this phase when I confront my fear of failures and try not to burden others with sharing my responsibilities. I am alone and I need no one to support my initiatives. Yes, this success is all mine and whatever small failures and setbacks I encounter are also mine.  

I have been accused of being a ‘one-person army’ quite a few times in the past too. I have tried to involve people but somehow failed to show that I truly need them to execute things. Actually, I don’t! My vision is clear and involving others simply dilutes it. I work best when I am all by myself. Now when once again my light has started shining bright, people blinded by my success have started  accusing me of being autocratic. 

When I take a look around myself, I find everyone is performing their own respective jobs without consulting anyone apart from the seniors. I do the same. People have started pointing out ‘Look there is a person doing full justice to the responsibilities given. Oh wait, she is a woman. Now how did this happen? Why doesn’t she ask someone for help? Why doesn’t she collapse from the workload? Why doesn’t she ever complaint about the number of hours she is putting in?

She won’t!

I tell you she is the toughest of the lot. So good luck to you guys for attempting to bring her down. It won’t work though. It was never meant to.

The only thing that worked towards my failure is my relationship. Rock and rolls all the way, it has now started on the decline phase. A phase where he hates my guts. When he insists on keeping it professional and distant. A phase where the light shines anew on all my vices. That is my only failure.

Even then I am the toughest nut to crack.