Dil hai ki Manta nahin

THE PAST:

‘Teri berukhi aur teri meherbaani

Yahi maut hai aur yahi zindagani.’

Everybody around me is desperately waiting for me to throw you out of my life, heart and mind. Everyone is waiting for the day when I will finally ‘Move On.’ All the people around me are trying to make me understand you jilted me not because I lack something or committed some grave sin. You jilted me because I was only an option for you, a very good one but just an option. For me – you are the only choice. I made mine and you made yours. Inspite of the whole wide world shouting in my ears at the top of the voice, my heart still trusts you. Implicitly…totally…wholly.

People say what is the use of it now? What purpose will it serve? Little does everyone know, love is the only thing without any hope, any agenda, any hidden motive. It never asks for anything in return, does not want anything in return.

My life has really become an open book. Out there for everyone to see and interpret as they deem fit.

Once again in your own words ‘I couldn’t be fake about anything even if I tried.’

Yet here you are, faking an entire life.

Me, I fake everything now. The smile, the laughter, the joy, the success. All of it is just a mask to hide the pain I go through every single day, every day. The world is the same and yet everything changed. I would not say I don’t want to live, I surely do. I would love to see what you promised to me. ‘Everything will be fine, everything will be fine, everything will be fine….EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE.’

Let’s see…

‘Bujhi huee sham aka dhuan hun, ab apni marqat ko jar raha hun.

Ye dil ki duniya to lut chuki hai, mai apni hasti mita raha hun.’

PS : I am waiting too.

THE PRESENT:

Thank you for if you were not there, I would never have known the kind of person I am. I would never have tested my courage to say what I want to say fearlessly. You made me fearless. I owe it all to you. This person that I am now is all you. You shattered my natural reserve, you made me seek my voice and express everything. You made me so grateful for my life and your presence in it. Now on, I will never settle for less in my life. I will always have the best. I will always ask for the best. Your gift to me is the knowledge that I am meant to do great things, have a great life. Stop at nothing!!

Thank you. I love you…

Disclaimer: The story I share with you all today; may or may not be true. For as a writer I am certainly influenced by what I see around me. At the same time, I retain what I call and known as artistic liberty.